Shock of a Lifetime
by Persiana13
Summary: A wannabe wants in on the Justice League, but everyone is suspicious of his motives.  Plus, he is being pursued by very dangerous assassins. Dedicated to A. Fox.  Prelude to Strength of the Mind.  Takes place in the DC Persiana-verse.
1. Chapter 1

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. A. Fox owns Electrode and Winston. _

Chapter 1: The New Guy 

A man dressed in all black was scaling the wall of a large mansion owned by Lex Luthor. His name is Plunder, and he is a bounty hunter and mercenary for hire. He does not speak often, but, when he does, it is often for two reasons; one, he's about to shoot you with the long rifle he carries. Two; he is telling you it is hopeless to fight him.

He stealthily scaled the side of the building, and landed silently on a balcony. The bounty hunter radioed in,

"It's me. I'm on the roof. How's the alarm going on?"

A male teen's voice said,

"We got the alarm's disabled. This is gonna be awesome!"  
Plunder shook his head,

"Electrode, must you have brought Fastball into this?"

A second male teen's voice said,

"Plunder, relax. I told him he could blow something up when we're done."

A third voice, a little more monstrous, cut in,

"Rip Roar hungry. Rip Roar want food."

Electrode said,

"I know. You can raid the fridge while we raid for the valuables."

Plunder rolled his eyes,

"How does Winston put up with you?"

Fastball smirked,

"He gets drunk a lot when he's not cooking."

He then added,

"Do you think he liked the new cooking set we got him?"

Electrode shrugged,

"Beats me. We did steal the money to pay for that thing from that psycho chick that likes me."

Fastball said,

"Which one? The one that throws dice, the one who always has an entourage following her, or Luthor's ex-wife?"

Rip Roar shook his head,

"Rip Roar thinks it was Contessa. Contessa scares Rip Roar with her screaming."

Electrode shuddered,

"That woman has sick tastes. I mean, I know I'm good looking and everything, but there is NO way I want to have her do the things she wants to do. Bondage is out."

He then added,

"Unless Zatanna's tying me down. Then, that's different."

Fastball laughed,

"Of come on. Did you see that outfit Wonder Woman was wearing?" (1)

Plunder growled,

"Are you done yet? I'd like to get this operation started."

Electrode nodded,

"Yeah, yeah. All set. All right, guys; let's have a little fun."

The alarm was disabled and the looting began.

Lex Luthor, the bald industrialist, was sleeping soundly in his bed when a loud crash aroused him from his sleep. He sat up,

"What's going on? What was that?"

He then saw his refrigerator get thrown into the room. He screamed for his bodyguard,

"MERCY!"

A gun slide sounded behind him. Plunder smirked underneath his mask,

"I wouldn't go calling for her, Luthor. She's tied up at the moment."

Rip Roar's voice could be heard,

"Rip Roar likes ice cream. Does scared lady like ice cream too?"

Electrode's voice could also be heard,

"Knowing her, she'd probably enjoy it if you licked it off her."

The billionaire growled,

"You four are dead meat when you leave here."

Plunder took the butt of his rifle and slammed it in Lex's face, knocking him out. He then began tying him to the bed.

Downstairs, a burly beast of a man with four arms and a red mane of hair was gorging on everything in sight. He is Rip Roar, formerly of the planet Apokolips. Bred to be a warrior, the four-armed brute was captured by a group of scientists that wanted to conduct experiments on him. Now, free, Rip Roar has developed a taste for Earth cuisine.

A blonde man in sleek-looking armor was carrying a bag, moving at superhuman speeds. His name is Fastball. He is a party animal and villain that tried to make it big in Central City, but never got enough street cred with the other Rogues. He flirts with women, and has no appreciation for the consequences of his actions.

Finally, the fourth thief, the teen Electrode, was a black-haired young man wearing a biker jacket and jeans. Lightning bolts showered the jacket, and he wore fingerless gloves. He flicked an electrical spark in his hands and threw it into the next room, shorting something electrical out.

Electrode had united them all together for one purpose and one purpose only; to steal from the super rich super villains. And Super heroes, too. More on that later.

Fastball ran around, cackling,

"Artwork! Electronics! Jewels! And it's all ours! HAHAHAHHAHAA!"

Electrode shook his head,

"Just keep looking around. There's bound to be something else valuable around here."

Mercy, who was tied to the chair, growled,

"Do you realize what you're doing? You're stealing from Lex Luthor! He's not going to forgive you for this!"  
Plunder walked in,

"Luthor's out cold."

Electrode looked at Mercy, then at Plunder, and, finally, back to Mercy. An evil smile formed across his face. Rip Roar groaned,

"Rip Roar no like what Electrode has planned."

The electric-powered thief said,

"Plunder, get my camera and get Mercy up to Lex's room in five minutes."

Plunder hefted the woman on his shoulders and walked out calmly, which was less than what Mercy was acting like.

**Ten minutes later… **

Rip Roar and Electrode were laughing as they took pictures of an unconscious Lex Luthor and Mercy in…compromising positions. Plunder shook his head,

"You two are unbelievable, you know that?"

Electrode flashed the camera and said,

"I just realized something; we could go into the blackmail business."

Fastball then came up,

"You guys aren't going to believe this!"

He looked at Luthor and Mercy,

"And, neither do I!"

Electrode waved off,

"We're done here. We should go."

The explosive-using speedster shook his head,

"Come on, you gotta see this."

**Downstairs… **

In his escapade to find valuables, Fastball had stumbled upon a secret door way under the mansion. Upon further investigation, the speedster found a room containing a large metallic shipping container. When Fastball opened the container, however, he could not believe what he saw.

Kryptonite.

Electrode blinked,

"There must be five tons of this stuff in here."

Fastball jumped up and down,

"So, what do you think?"

Plunder folded his arms, smirking underneath his mask,

"I think the ticking time bomb just made our night."

Electrode grinned,

"Oh, yeah. Let's get this stuff back to our place."

Next Chapter:

Luthor wants revenge for the thieves stealing his Kryptonite, and he'll go through any length to get it back. Plus, the League investigates this new team of villains. Read more, next chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. A. Fox owns Electrode and Winston. _

Chapter 2: Getting Wind 

Lois Lane, the raven-haired reported for the Daily Planet, was typing a story on the recent robbery at Luthor's mansion. She looked over to her husband, Clark Kent, the hero Superman and said,

"Somebody must have a death wish to steal from Lex."

Clark, in his reporter guise, shook his head,

"I'm surprised Luthor got such an accurate description of the thieves. Plus, these thieves knew exactly how to break in."

Just then, Lois received an e-mail. The e-mail simply stated,

_Got a line on the robbery. One word; Kryptonite. Get Superman and some of his League buddies. _

Lois looked at Clark. Clark was seemingly engrossed in the police report. The raven-haired reporter started to tip-toe away when Clark, who had not looked up, said,

"What's this about Kryptonite?"

Lois sighed angrily,

"I am not even going to ask how you know, but, yes. Someone e-mailed me about the robbery and said the thieves might have stolen some Kryptonite."

Superman adjusted his glasses,

"Superman'll just have to be prepared then, won't he?"

**Meanwhile, in San Francisco… **

The home of the four thieves was an abandoned construction site in the suburbs. Construction stopped due to a sinkhole that had been discovered. However, Electrode had found some excavation equipment and tunneled further and further down, until he had fashioned a grotto and another exit out of the underground passage. This other exit was on the outskirts of town. Eventually, with the construction site abandoned, the city began turning it into a dump and dropping all sorts of trash and junk down the hole.  
Fastball had made some explosives, sending the trash further down so it would not fill up the grotto.

The grotto itself was fashioned similar to the Bat-cave, only there were no massive computers, no bats, and no cool car. Electrode had stolen some experimental teleport watches and that was how the team got around.

Winston was in the kitchen, cooking breakfast. He sighed as he called out,

"Flapjacks almost ready!"

He added quietly,

"Morons are going to get me killed on day."

Winston was not native to this reality; he is from a reality called Earth Prime. He came into this world due to an encounter with the hero from that world, Superboy Prime. Superboy Prime was the only hero in the entire world, while the others were all fictional. Winston found himself in a lab where Superboy Prime was beating up scientists who had created an energy field to stop him. However, when he attempted to help, Winston got caught in the vortex and ended up here, in this reality. With Electrode's help, he has become the chef for the gang, but often wonders why he is still in this world and not back to his. Electrode promised him a way back, but, so far, has yet to deliver on that promise.

Fastball was watching TV on the luxury leather sofa they procured from a corrupt politician, who peddled welfare funds for his own swimming pool. Plunder was checking his rifle, meticulously and ceremoniously cleaning it as if it were a holy relic. Electrode was at the computer, getting ready to sell the embarrassing photos of Luthor and Mercy to the highest bidder. Rip Roar was watching over his shoulder, curious as to what was going on.

Electrode grinned,

"Now, which tabloid should get this?"

Rip Roar said,

"Find the one that told you about Rip Roar! Rip Roar like that one!"

The electricity-powered super human shrugged,

"I don't know. I was thinking about the one that broke the story on a certain now-infamous golfer."

Rip Roar laughed,

"Rip Roar thought it was funny when he was nearly run over."

Just then, there was an e-mail received. Electrode opened it and read the following,

_Got your message. Where do you want to meet? _

Electrode grinned,

"Boys, we're in business."

He typed,

"One hour, seaport district in Metropolis. Bring your lead gloves."

He sent the e-mail and grinned,

"Oh, we are so going to make money."

Electrode smelled something from the kitchen and shouted,

"Flapjacks are done!"

Rip Roar bolted,

"Me Rip Roar likes flapjacks!"

Winston shouted,

"No! Rip Roar, don't run in here again!"

The sounds of several expensive kitchen appliances being smashed were heard, as Rip Roar and Fastball tore the place apart looking for maple syrup. Electrode and Plunder blinked. The electric-powered thief said,

"Next time, we're stealing a new kitchen set."

Plunder groaned out loud; how did he ever get talked into this group?

**One Hour, and stacks of Flapjacks later… **

The four thieves teleported to one of the piers in the seaport. Electrode said,

"Plunder, find a place to cover us. I don't like being exposed."

The bounty hunter teleported away, looking for a good vantage point. Fastball said,

"I'll scout around."

He sped away.

Five seconds later, there was an explosion. Fastball was cackling maniacally,

"He's here! He's here!"  
Electrode rolled his eyes,

"Five seconds; a new record. Come on, Rip!"

The two ran in the direction of the explosion.

Fastball cackled maniacally,

"You'll never catch me!"

He was currently in a speed race with Wally West, the Flash. The speedster hero called out,

"Dude, I'm the Fastest Man Alive. Watch!"

He sped in front of the explosive-using speedster and tripped him. Electrode could only watch as Fastball went head first into a crate.

Rip Roar got angry,

"Rip Roar smash red man!"

He charged in after Flash, but was leveled by Wonder Woman. The brute went flying into a wall, but got up,

"Rip Roar shall crush you!"

He breathed a stream of fire in Diana's direction. The Amazon warrior rolled out of the way and tried to go at him, but the four-armed brute slammed all of his fists into the back of Wonder Woman.

Electrode called in,

"Plunder, where's my cover fire?"

Plunder was dropped in front of him. Bruce Wayne, the hero Batman, had just knocked him unconscious. Electrode blinked,

"I think I should be going."

He turned, only to stare right at Farrah Willows, the feral heroine Persiana. The lioness grinned,

"Go ahead. Run. It'll be fun for me."

Batman glared,

"Where's the Kryptonite?"

The electric powered thief asked innocently,

"Can't we all just get along?"

Diana slammed Rip Roar into the dock. Rip Roar groaned,

"Rip Roar hurt."

He rubbed his head with one of his hands.

Batman glared,

"Where is it?"

Electrode looked at him,

"Is this the infamous Batman stare? The one that always causes the villains to freeze up?"

He was grabbed by the throat. Electrode said,

"All right, calm down. I'll give it to ya, geez."

He was let go and pulled out a five pound piece of Kryptonite. Batman snatched it and said,

"What about everything else you took?"

Fastball groaned,

"Man, how does he know these things?"

Flash looked down,

"Hey, I know you. You're Fastball. I used to fight you back in Central City."

The speedster villain smirked,

"Now, I got a new crew and I'm gonna kick your ass again, Flash!"

Persiana shouted,

"Wait a minute!"

The lioness stepped down and folded her arms,

"Look, I know these guys aren't the brightest bulbs in the tree…"

She noticed Electrode staring at her backside. Farrah smirked,

"Nice try, but I don't think my boyfriend would appreciate you staring at me. He is liable to run his sword through you. He's tried to do it to Booster Gold and Green Arrow."

Electrode shook his head,

"I guess you're interested in the five tons of Kryptonite we stole."  
This got the League's attention. Diana said,

"Five tons?"

Batman was about to go for Electrode again when he said,

"Hold it, Bats. We'll tell you where the stuff is, but you have to do something for us."

He paused dramatically,

"We want to join the Justice League."

Next Chapter:  
How will this play out? Plus, Luthor rallies some assassins to go after Electrode and his gang.


	3. Chapter 3

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. _

Chapter 3: Offers Made 

Flash blinked,

"Wait, you four want to what?"

Electrode folded his arms, smugly remarking,

"We want to join the Justice League."

Diana shook her head,

"And I thought Persiana was crazy."

Electrode smirked,

"Oh, come on. You let the psycho cat girl on the team, and, from what I heard, she's pulled off worse."

Rip Roar laughed,

"Rip Roar likes how cat girl hurts Catman!"

Persiana growled,

"The idiot deserves it. When is he going to take a hint?"

The electric-powered thief grinned,

"You see. Why not?"

Flash shook his head,

"How do we know you're not just using us?"

Plunder snickered,

"Actually, he just wants to join so he can kill Wonder Man."

At this, Electrode snapped, shouting,

"THAT SELF-RIGHTEOUS, WOMANIZING BASTARD IS GOING TO DIE! HOW DARE HE STEAL THE WOMAN OF MY DREAMS FROM ME!"  
He launched a lightning bolt, causing a barrel to explode. He was seething with anger.

Wonder Woman asked,

"Could you explain this to me?"

Plunder answered,

"Electrode has a thing for Zatanna. He thinks she's calling out to him in his dreams to rescue her from Wonder Man."

Persiana laughed,

"Trust me when I tell ya; it's Wonder Man that needs rescuing from her, as well as Gypsy or Vixen."

Fastball whined,

"He's sleeping with my Vixen! I'll blow him up!"

Rip Roar shook his head,

"Rip Roar does not understand why you guys like those girls."

He waved sheepishly,

"Rip Roar likes Persiana."

The lioness heroine smiled,

"Aw, that's so cute of you. But, I have a boyfriend."

She scratched underneath his chin, making him giggle like a little boy.

Batman looked at the bounty hunter,

"And, what's your story?"

Plunder shook his head,

"Just getting paid to do a job. Nothing more."

Electrode powered down,

"So, when do we join up?"

Batman glared,

"As soon as you return everything you stole, and give me the five tons of Kryptonite."

Electrode blinked at that,

"That's not fair! That bastard Luthor killed a lot of people to get that Kryptonite! There's no way I'm giving it back to someone that can buy the system off like that!"

The Dark Knight said,

"If you want to be heroes, you can't go out and commit crimes."

Electrode flipped him off,

"Screw this. We're outta here!"

With that, the four teleported away. Persiana shook her head,

"Wow; that was weird, and I'm from another reality."

**Meanwhile… **

Lex Luthor was furious to say the least. He had been robbed and humiliated in his own home, by a bunch of wannabe thieves. They stole from him the Kryptonite. He was going to make an example out of them.

Besides being an industrialist and scientist, Luthor was also a master manipulator and shrewd businessman. He had many contacts at his disposal, even some with, shall we say, that had little to no morals or qualms about killing. Being in good standing with several secret assassin organizations and underworld characters, Luthor purchased the services of several highly trained, well equipped assassins to find the thieves, punish them, and recover the Kryponite stolen from him. He was prepared to pay a pretty penny for such vengeance.

At present, he was walking across his line up of assassins that he had hand-picked for this job.

First, there was a man with a half-orange, half-black mask on. He had a sword, a staff, and a rifle at the ready. His name is Slade Wilson, the mercenary Deathstroke, a master marksman, martial artist, and tactician.

Second was an Asian woman with a long snake tattoo down her arm. She was wearing a black face mask and outfit, and she had a bow and arrow set with her. Her name is Shado, a Yakuza assassin.

Third was a man dressed in a spotted cat-suit with a cat-like mask and poisonous claws. His name is Catseye, another Yakuza assassin.

Finally, there was Catman.

Mercy looked at Luthor,

"I hate to ask this, but why did you call in Catman?"

Catman said triumphantly,

"Think of it! When I defeat the thieves and retrieve the stolen goods, Luthor will pay enough so I can have my dream wedding with the were-cat goddesses!"

There was silence as soon as the period was at the end of the sentence. Luthor said,

"Besides, Catman needs work."

Mercy looked at the bald billionaire,

"You do realize that, if Persiana does show up, Catman is toast, right?"

Deathstroke smirked,

"That's called bait."

Luthor ordered,

"Gentlemen."

Shado cleared her throat. Lex said,

"And lady."

Shado smirked,

"Better."

Luthor continued,

"Now then; find me my Kryptonite and the thieves responsible! Make them all pay!"

Next Chapter:

More Wackiness from Electrode and his gang!

AN: Shado is a canon character who is a skilled archer. In the comics, she later betrayed the Yakuza. She has no qualms about killing, as long as it is honorable.

AN: Catseye is another canon character, not to be confused with Marvel's Catseye. The DC Catseye is in fact, a Yakuza assassin. He has low level super speed and poisoned claws.


	4. Chapter 4

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. _

Chapter 4: Thoughts on it All 

**Back at Electrode's base… **

Electrode screamed,

"Those low-life bastards! Wonder Man must've bought them off so he can keep my Zatanna all to himself!"  
He fired off an electric spark, hitting a print out poster of the sorceress. Electrode looked at the smoldering poster catch fire and screamed even louder,

"DAMN YOU, WONDER MAN! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOU WILL DIE AN AGONIZING DEATH!"  
Winston shook his head,

"I take it they did not let you on."

Fastball nodded,

"Yeah, the least they could do is let me have a little alone time with Vixen."

Winston shook his head,

"As far as I am concerned, you two need to keep your hormones in check if you're going out on the next job."

He added,

"Besides, both Zatanna and Vixen are WAY overrated."

Plunder grumbled,

"Great, here it comes."

The electric powered thief and the speedster thief both looked at Winston like he had lost his mind. Electrode said,

"Winston, are you HIGH or something? Just what is so appealing about Gypsy that would make her better than Zatanna?"

Winston looked at him evenly,

"First of all, I don't have any weird delusions about Zatanna, nor do I plaster her all over the wall of my room. And, I most certainly do not use a ten-thousand dollar computer to enhance her bust size to a freakishly high degree, unlike SOME people."

The phone rang at that moment. Rip Roar answered it,

"Hello?"

At this, the four-armed powerhouse's eyes widened. He quickly hung up,

"Uh, Electrode. Rip Roar just got a call about the girls that like you. They are coming here."

Electrode stood up,

"What? When?"

A loud crash was heard, followed by several screams, something akin to,

"HANDS OFF MY MAN, BITCH!"

"KISS MY ASS, GRANNY!"

"Electrode, I love you!"  
A crash was heard. Fastball cackled,

"Catfight!"  
Indeed, three women rolled into the main room, all wrestling on top of each other and pulling out each other's hair. One of them was a black-haired woman wearing expensive clothes. Her name is Godiva, a telepathic manipulator who loved attention.

The second woman was a blonde wearing red and black and carried a set of magic dice with her. Her name is Hazard, the granddaughter of the villain the Gambler.

The third woman was a brown haired young woman with poise and grace. Her name is Contessa, Luthor's ex-wife, and possible near-immortal.

Contessa kicked the other two women away and called out,

"Electrode, I am here! Let me show you how much I love you!"

Hazard hissed,

"Fat chance, Grandma! You already had your bite at the apple! His name is Lex Luthor!"

Contessa snapped,

"For your information, Luthor left me for that slut Mercy! Oh, how I hate her so much!"

Godiva laughed,

"Hah! If you just admit I am the best woman here, Electrode would not even bother wasting time with barbarians like you!"  
At this, the other two women jumped the charmer and a fight broke out. Plunder shook his head,

"They still haven't learned from the last time they were here."

Rip Roar winced,

"Rip Roar remembers property damage done. Repair bills were high."

Fastball laughed,

"Hey, Electrode. Why don't you tell these ladies about Zatanna?"

Electrode let out another scream. He really hated Wonder Man.

**Meanwhile, Aboard the Watchtower… **

Persiana was talking with Green Arrow and Flash about the new group of thieves they had encountered. The feline shrugged,

"Personally, I gotta give props to whoever steals from Lex. The guy deserves it."

She snarled, adding,

"Especially for hiring that psycho bastard Pym. I promise very painful things to him if I ever get my hands on him again."

Green Arrow shook his head,

"I don't think so. I mean, yeah, Luthor buys off the system now and again, but what they're doing is just as bad, making Luthor to be the victim in all of this."

Flash shook his head,

"I'm not comfortable with the fact that they've got one of my Rogues on there. Granted, he technically wasn't as bad ass as Captain Cold and Mirror Master, but still. It just seems suspicious."

The lioness said,

"What about me? Technically, I am a villain."

The speedster shook his head,

"That's different. That was an unfair law."

Ollie said,

"I just hope this is the last we hear of them."  
Persiana sipped some milk,

"Not likely. Bats is working overtime to try and find the missing Kryptonite. Since they teleported away, he figured tracking any sort of spatial disturbance when teleportation occurs."

She downed the rest of her milk before continuing,

"Besides, this guy Electrode wants to kill Simon for stealing Zatanna from him."

At that precise moment, Wonder Man came running by,

"HELP! GET HER OFF OF ME!"  
Zatanna was in hot pursuit, little pink hearts floating around her. She cackled,

"Come back, my Simon!"  
Flash blinked,

"I don't get it. How exactly did Simon steal Zatanna from this guy Electrode?"

Farrah shrugged,

"He's probably following the same logic like Catman does every time he sees me with Lance."

The archer remarked,

"That explains a lot."

He smirked,

"I just hope none of my other exes ever show up again. It was hard enough explaining to Canary about my son Connor." (1)

Persiana smirked,

"Don't say that. You'll jinx yourself. I've seen it happen with Superman."

Next Chapter:

Electrode devises a plan to sell the Kryptonite, but Luthor plans to intervene before then with his assassins. Will they survive? Find out next time!

(1) For more information on this, please Read Crimes of Passion


	5. Chapter 5

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana. owns Electrode and Winston. _

Chapter 5: Assassins Strike Part 1 

Electrode shook his head,

"Ladies, this is really not a good time right now."

Hazard whined,

"But, I need you. I need you to prove to these bitches I'm the woman of your dreams."

Contessa slammed a boot in the blonde's face, laying her out. She then looked at the electric powered thief with a hungry, predatory look in her eyes,

"Come now, love. You could not have pulled the robbery off without my help."

She grumbled,

"Bastard owes me alimony, and I aim to collect."

Godiva pushed her away,

"Forget it, Contessa! Electrode's my man, and I'm not letting some cougar steal him from me!"

Gambler shook her head,

"As if you're any better. I seem to recall you hiring your own entourage to follow you around wherever you go!"

Godiva slapped the dice-using villainess hard,

"Should you be using those dice to play in some lame Dungeons and Dragons game in some guy's mother's basement?"  
Hazard shrieked,

"DIE!"  
The two villainesses rolled around, a cat-fight breaking out. Fastball cheered,

"Cat-fight!"  
Plunder groaned,

"Why couldn't I have just been incarcerated? Why did I have to join this insane group of people?"

Winston looked at Electrode,

"You better get them to stop. Otherwise, we're not going to have a base left."

The electricity-powered thief sighed,

"I know, I know. Geez, I steal Kryptonite from Luthor and try to sell it back to him, and this happens."

He rolled up his sleeves,

"Ladies, I need to tell you something…"

**Meanwhile, outside… **

Shado, Catman, Deathstroke, and Catseye were on the trail of the thieves. Catman moaned,

"Why are we pursuing them? I have better things to do; namely pursue my mate and bride Persiana!"

Slade looked at him,

"Blake, did the thought ever occur to you that maybe Persiana does not want to be with you?"

The love-struck feline shook his head, gasping,

"Blasphemy! You speak as if my goddess has no taste in men!"

Shado added,

"Besides, Slade; was it not you that pursued a woman young enough to be your granddaughter?"  
The mercenary decided to keep his mouth shut.

Catseye looked at them and said something in Japanese. Shado nodded,

"Catseye has picked up the trail."

The two Yakuza assassins pointed to the construction yard that, below, housed Electrode's gang. Slade nodded,

"All right, let's move in for a closer look."

**Aboard the Watchtower… **

Batman was working to try and find spatial disturbances. He ran scans across the globe, but it was tedious and time consuming to scan the entire planet. Still, this was his best lead.

Just then, he got something. The Dark Knight figured that the frequency for the teleportation devices would be different from that of the Watchtower's. So, he eliminated any area that had the signal, and looked for matching ones of different frequencies. He finally got a hit in California…

**Back at Electrode's base… **

The women that liked Electrode were all in tears. Electrode said,

"I'm sorry, ladies, but I stand by what I said. The only woman for me is Zatanna…"

He yelled skyward,

"AND I'LL KILL WONDER MAN FOR STEALING HER FROM ME!"  
Rip Roar shook his head,

"Rip Roar will never get why Electrode likes Zatanna."

Winston said,

"Probably the same reason why Catman likes Persiana."

Just then, the cook saw a green gas coming in through the vents. He ordered,

"Everybody out, now! Someone's gassing this place!"  
Fastball ran and returned quickly with gas masks. He got them on everyone as Winston pulled a lever leading to an emergency exit to the surface.

Each of the villains made their way through the corridor, but, as they reached the surface, Catseye, using his super speed, incapacitated the women. Shado fired a flash bang arrow and blinded everyone present. Rip Roar snarled,

"Rip Roar cannot see! Rip Roar smash!"  
He flailed his arms around, as if to hit something. He was then brought down with a bullet into his knees. Slade shook his head,

"Too easy."

Catman pulled out a cat claw weapon and grinned as he picked up a dazed Electrode,

"Now, tell me where the Kryptonite is. I must get my reward so I can rescue my goddess from the evil Diablos!"

A Bat-arang was thrown hitting the feline villain's hand. He turned, snarling,

"Who did that?"

He then looked up and his mouth gaped open at the most heavenly sight he would ever see.

It was Persiana, and she, along with Black Canary, Batman, Green Arrow, Wonder Man, and Zatanna.

Electrode's eyes widened and he, along with Catman, shouted out,

"!"  
Shado rolled her eyes,

"This is just terrific. Those two are acting like little children."

The Yakuza archer then noticed Green Arrow. She narrowed her eyes,

"Something is familiar about him."

She removed her mask and tried to get a closer look.

Ollie was wide-eyed,

"Oh, crap."

Persiana and Batman picked up on this. The Dark Knight said,

"Keep focused."

It was then that Shado shouted,

"Oliver Queen, you gaijin!"  
Canary blinked,

"Does this woman know you?"  
Ollie shook his head, then realized,

"Wait, I have seen her before, somewhere."

Shado's eyes widened as she screeched,

"YOU SHOULD, SINCE YOU FATHERED MY SON!" (1) 

Next Chapter:  
The Assassins vs. The Justice League vs. Electrode's group.

(1) Before you respond, yes, this is Canon. Ollie Queen had a relationship with a Yakuza assassin that resulted in a son named Robert.

Shado (steps out): And he hasn't paid me child support yet!

Contessa (steps out): Men always skimp out on money. Take Lex. The guy owes me alimony!

Canary: QUEEN! (Brandishes Katana, chases after Ollie)  
Ollie: HELP! HELP! SHE'S NUTS! 


	6. Chapter 6

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. A. Fox owns Electrode and Winston. _

Chapter 6: Assassins Strike Part 2 

Winston shook his head,

"Wow, hang around this crowd long enough and you think you've seen it all."

He was watching his friend and boss Electrode attempting to shock Wonder Man, his 'arch-nemesis', into submission for stealing Zatanna from him. Naturally, Zatanna did not take this very well and, spearing Electrode, began dishing out some punishment of her own without using her powers.

Catman was getting the usual beat down from Persiana, and Rip Roar was taking notes on how to twist Catman's limbs into very weird angles. Of course, the sickening cracks only fueled the four-armed warrior's interest and, to add insult to injury, breathed both fire and ice onto Catman.

But, the most shocking of it all was when Shado, one of the assassins that Luthor hired, had run into her old flame, which happened to be Green Arrow. No one was quite sure how these two first met, but, when the Yakuza archer mentioned that she had a son by him, things went down hill for the Emerald Archer and fast. Canary pulled out a katana she kept and she and Shado began chasing Ollie all over the place, shouting out various things they would do to him and certain parts of his anatomy once they caught him.

This left Deathstroke and Catseye to deal with Batman, Plunder, and Fastball. The Yakuza assassin sped around them, but Fastball saw it coming and speared him at super speed, while Slade, Plunder, and the Caped Crusader battled it out.

Catseye attempted to swipe with his claws at the explosive speedster. Fastball dodged it and scoffed,

"Come on, I move faster than this in my sleep!"

The Yakuza assassin got angry at his opponent, muttering something underneath his breath. He continued to use his low-level super speed in an attempt to hit the speedster. Fastball's attitude and continued taunts started drilling a hole deeper and deeper into the Yakuza assassin until he erupted in rage and made a mistake. That was when Fastball tied an explosive to the assassin's chest and waved,

"Buh-bye!"

He sped away as the ensuing explosion rocked the area. Catseye was no longer there, disappearing in the smoke of the explosion. More than likely, he was dead.

Batman and Plunder were busy handling Slade. Deathstroke pulled out his rifle,

"Mine's bigger."

Plunder pulled out his rifle,

"It's obvious you're compensating for something."

The two were in a heated stand-off, so much so that bales of tumbleweed were rolling past them, and, oddly enough, the music of a western showdown was playing. Slade said,

"Wait, that's my phone."

He pulled out his cell phone and said,

"Hello?"

It was Terra,

"Baby, when are you coming back? You said you were going to take me out tonight."

Slade sighed,

"Honey, I'm in the middle of something right now-."

Batman and Plunder both looked at each other, wondering what was going on.

Terra continued,

"You never want to make any time with me. You don't love me anymore!"

Slade tried to calm her down,

"That's not true. I do love you. I really do. It's just…"

He looked up and noticed the slight snickering of the two others there. He said,

"Hey, this is a private call!"

He turned around, trying to make the conversation private,

"Listen, I will be back as soon as I can, all right? I just need to take care of this job and I will be back as soon as I can. We'll go to the most expensive restaurant you want to go to."

Terra cheered,

"Yay! Thanks! You're the best. Mwah!"

Slade hung up, sighing,

"That could not have come at a worse time."

Just then, Batman's cell phone went off. He groaned,

"Not now."

He checked who was calling. He was tempted to just let it go to voice mail, but, when the Dark Knight saw who was calling, his eyes widened and he quickly answered,

"Hello?"

"It's Diana. When are you coming back to the manor, Bruce? I want to play as Black Queen again!"

Bruce shifted uncomfortably,

"Diana, this phone could be bugged."

"Well, I'm bugged that you don't love me anymore!"

"That's not true. I do care about you, but I'm in the middle of something right now."

Plunder said,

"Screw this. I'm not waiting."

He fired his rifle and the bullet hit Slade right in the head, sending him over. Although his healing factor would help him recover, the mercenary was out of the count.

Batman said,

"I'll call you back."

He hung up,

"Was that really necessary?"

Catman was screeching in pain as he was set on fire,

"HELP! I'M ON FIRE!"  
Rip Roar shouted,

"RIP ROAR COOL YOU DOWN!"  
He shot a blast of ice, causing the feline villain to shiver. Persiana pulled out a chain saw,

"NOW, WE MAKE SHAVED ICE!"  
Plunder looked at the Dark Knight,

"Is that?"

Bruce nodded,

"Good point."

Zatanna shouted,

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT TYPE OF PERVERT YOU ARE, BUT I LOVE SIMON! HE'S THE ONLY MAN FOR ME! SO, LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
She slapped him hard, but what the magician failed to realize was that, during the exchange, Contessa, Hazard, and Godiva all glared venomously at Zatanna and, tackling her, it escalated into a full-blown catfight.

Plunder and Winston looked at Batman. Winston said,

"I take it the assassins are after the Kryptonite. That stuff's been trouble since we got it."

Plunder added,

"If we show you where it is…do we get a pardon?"

Batman narrowed his eyes, giving that infamous glare. The sharp-shooter said,

"Somehow, I didn't think you would."

Shado shouted,

"QUEEN, GET BACK HERE AND PAY ME MY CHILD SUPPORT!"  
Canary added,

"AND THEN, I'LL NEUTER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP!"  
Ollie shouted,

"HELP ME! IT'S NOT MY FAULT! I'M A GUY!"  
Plunder shook his head,

"And I thought we were crazy."

Next Chapter:

In the stunning conclusion, a greater force at work wants Electrode's gang to team with another insane group from another reality. Find out more, next time!


	7. Chapter 7

**Shock of a Lifetime **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. A. Fox owns Electrode and Winston. _

Chapter 7: A Greater Destiny Awaits! 

Three days later, Electrode's gang of thieves were out on the open road. The traveling band of thieves were wandering, looking for a new base, since their old one was now compromised thanks to Lex and the Justice League. Electrode, dressed in a derby hat, black suit, and carrying an umbrella, whined,

"This sucks! We lose the Kryptonite, we lose our home, and, most importantly, I lost all my Zatanna collection. Do you have any idea what I went through to get that stuff?"

Winston, dressed in a sombrero and poncho over his clothes, said,

"Considering most of that collection was footage of Zatanna in her dressing room before her shows, it was a tragedy for you. I hate to ask this, but was there any other footage of women you had on there too?"

Fastball grinned,

"Looking for a little Gypsy love?"

Winston shook his head,

"Unlike you and Sparky over there, I happen to treat Gypsy like a human being and not some perverted sexual object. Besides, I can treat her to a home-cooked meal better than you two ever could."

Plunder snickered,

"Electrode's idea of a home-cooked meal is ordering fast-food."

Electrode snapped,

"Hey, some places can make a decent hamburger!"

Rip Roar laughed,

"Remember that one time Electrode fried the toaster?"

Fastball howled,

"He blew up the entire kitchen!"  
Winston folded his arms,

"That's precisely why I banned him from the kitchen after that. There is no way I am letting him near it again after that. I still haven't figured out how a bowl of cold cereal was set on fire, or how you did it, too."

Just then, Godiva, Hazard, and Contessa shrieked for joy at finding them. The three female villains all tackled Electrode hard and kissed him. Rip Roar shook his head,

"Why can't Rip Roar get pretty girls like that?"

Suddenly, the eight of them were enveloped in a bright light, whisking them from this reality…

**Meanwhile, aboard the Watchtower… **

Persiana sighed,

"It's too bad those guys decided not to join us. They seemed all right."

Superman looked at the feral heroine,

"From what I heard, those five should be locked up in an insane asylum. I don't even know how they pull of what they pull off."

Shayera said,

"Well, at least the Kryptonite was recovered."

Farrah nodded,

"That counts for something. And Batman did let them skate by with a warning."

John Stewart said,

"Well, let's hope we've heard the last of them for a while."

Green Arrow ran by, screaming,

"HELP! SHE'S AFTER ME!"  
Canary was right behind him, shouting,

"YOU WOMANIZING CHEAT! I'LL GET YOU!"  
She was swinging a katana, chasing him across the halls of the Watchtower. J'onn said,

"So, I am guessing Dinah has not accepted the fact that Oliver has fathered yet another son."

Farrah nodded,

"Yeah. I heard about what happened when Hawke came to the Mansion. I can only imagine the type of destruction caused by that sort of chaos."

She sipped some milk,

"You know, I just thought of something; I want children with my man."

Superman shuddered,

"I'm having horrible nightmares for months now."

**In an unknown dimension… **

Electrode's gang was teleported to an otherworldly plane. Electrode shook his head as he got up,

"My head! Damn it, Wonder Man! Why can't you leave my Zatanna alone?"

A booming voice shouted,

"SILENCE! YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN!"  
Rip Roar looked around at the vast plane, but there was nothing. It was as if they were all teleported to the end of existence. The booming voice continued,

"DO NOT BE FOOLED! I HAVE CHOSEN YOU TO-!"  
Another voice, a child's, whined,

"When is it going to be my turn?"

A third voice, a woman's, said,

"After me, half-pint."

There was a dog's bark and, as the eight people looked at each other, confused as to what was going on, the white areas came down and five people were revealed. All of them were dressed similarly, red and black, and with swords across their backs. One was a man, another was a woman, a third looked like a kid, the fourth looked like a dog, and the fifth was a floating head.

The first said,

"Greetings, other worldly travelers! I'm Deadpool, and I run the Deadpool Corps!"

Deadpool pointed down the line,

"Here's Lady Deadpool, Kidpool, Dogpool, and Headpool."

Plunder blinked,

"Uh, who are you guys?"

Kidpool said,

"We're Deadpools from different realities, and we're gonna save the multiverse."

Deadpool added,

"And, for some weird reason, the writer of this fan-fiction decided you eight are needed to help us. Which, I don't know why, considering the five of us can make Galactus wet his pants easily. I mean, come on, I'm on every Marvel variant there is, was, and ever shall be! Why? Because I am…DEADPOOL!"  
The others blinked at him. Winston groaned,

"Great, another bunch of insane freaks. Oh, joy."

Headpool hovered near Hazard,

"So, babe. Got a name to go with that hot body of yours?"

Hazard kicked the disembodied head all the way across the room. Headpool screamed,

"AAAHH!"

He crashed into the TV. Dogpool walked over and lifted his leg, causing Headpool to cry out,

"Bad dog!"  
Lady Deadpool looked at Plunder,

"So, what's your name?"

Plunder said,

"My name is Plunder, and I'm a bounty hunter."

He then noticed the hungry look in the lady merc's eyes and gulped,

"Uh-oh. AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

The chase was on; Lady Deadpool pursuing Plunder across the room. Electrode grinned,

"So, we're supposed to help you guys save the multiverse?"

He looked at his team,

"Winston, prepare a meal! We have a lot to talk about!"

Winston groaned,

"Why do I stay with this insane crowd? Why?"

End of Shock of a Lifetime!


End file.
